Tuesday, 15 July 2008
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Human Decency Membership Card
So I was talking to Michael about food service and retail, because he works for Starbucks and I used to. Rants about the lack of common courtesy resident in humanity are frequent for those of us who serve the general public. It was an Olympic event when I lived at home with my two other siblings who also work for Starbucks - we would spend 30 minutes at a time dissecting our days and discussing customer horror stories.
This recent conversation led Michael and I to the following conclusion: everyone should be required to carry a Human Decency Membership Card. At any time a person may be called upon to supply their HDMC if the veracity of your membership is doubted. If it is determined that you are not following the rules of the HDMC, your card may be torn violently from your offending hand and ripped up for the world to see. Speeches regarding your character (or lack thereof) may ensue. Sound harsh? It is. This may be an exlcusive club, as it seems the general populace is trending downward in the things that make us human. Here are some very salient membership requirements, the first and most important being:
1. You MUST have worked in food service/retail industry at some point in your life for a minimum of 60 days.
Why? Because most people wouldn't be such douchebags if they had to serve others for a little bit. You really get to see how awful or great people can be when presented with the opportunity to belittle someone in a position of servitude. People would be nicer at the drive-thrus. Folks would actually tip well. Impatience regarding the arrival of your meal would be nonexistent. Rudeness at the checkout in the grocery store would disappear. When you have been treated with condescension and cruelty just because you make lattes for a living, you are less likely to injure someone else in the same manner. You will also lose the proclivity to assume that the world revolves around you and your Triple Grande Nonfat, No-Foam, 1/3 Decaf, 2 1/2 Pump Vanilla, 190 Degree Latte.
2. You cannot own a Hummer. You just lost all humanity points.
I'm not a communist. I just think these vehicles should be illegal.
3. You must learn to memorize & utilize such phrases as "Please", "Thank You", "You're Welcome", "After You", "I'm sorry", "It was my fault", "I apologize", "I forgive you", "Take Your Time", & "No problem".
You also must mean those phrases and act accordingly. Please refrain from sighing, tapping impatiently, or demanding free things.
And really there is only one rule of membership and that is the Golden one: "Treat others as you would like to be treated". This ethic of reciprocity should be inherent in those who consider themselves decent human beings and owners of the HDMC.
I never do this, but I'm fond of this post & passionate about this topic. Comment if you want, but please recommend it if you agree with anything. And feel free to add to this list or to share your own stories.
I may also create some type of code for your blog if you or someone you know is eligible for membership. The card above is a mock-up, so please express your interest if you would like this card and the badge of honor it portrays.
EDIT: That is the completed card above - I decided to utilize the most carried card in US Society...no offense to our foreign compatriots. I was just trying to be ironic. Also, I'm not really good with creating codes that can be inserted into your blog. I'm sorry. I might need some assistance? In the meantime, here's the img src code that you can award yourself if you meet the requirements or award to someone else ok?
<img src="http://xf4.xanga.com/362c9032d2632200475588/m155344813.jpg" alt="hdmc" style="width:580px" />
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Comments (349)
Haha.... I've worked as a waitress and banquet server at an Italian restaurant, attendant at a boat launch/beach house, clerk at a small town - kinko's-type place, and assistant manager at Walgreens ---- all of which have thrown me into situations where I pondered whether the population of decent persons had become entirely extinct. Hmm... for some reason it's a little better in the computer service industry, where I work now.
I am digging the card! Where may I sign up? Could I please get some cards made up to hand out to jerks that I come across in public? I too work in the food/retail industry but what really irks me is when I see some Joe treat the person who has just made their coffee so rudely. I tip generously if the service is good. I've gotten my husband to not be such a cheapskate in tipping too. If the server is attentive to both of us, then I make sure they are well-tipped. But, perhaps in having some business cards made like that, I could hand them out to those who are mean and rude. Perhaps they would learn to appreciate the value of being served. Thanks so much for sharing that!
I want one! I am currently worked in retail for over two years, and deal with rude, snobby rich customers all day long. I also worked as a manager for Papa's Murphies Pizza for 9 mo.
I hold doors open for people...even when they get mad at me. And love treating other retail industry employees with the highest for of respect. I try to keep in mind...if they are rude...that they might be having a bad day!
I also believe in 20% tips!!!!!!!
I drive a honda Civic which gets 30 miles to the gallon!!!!!!!
Do I earn one?!?!?!?!?!
Ooooo. I love it!! The membership card and the post. I've worked custodial the past three summers and I am at it again this year. I never realized how much work custodians do for people until I experienced the work load myself. Or just how rude people can be to the people responsible for cleaning the toilets. Hey, someone has to do it, lol. I also take care not to put my hands on door windows anymore, finger smudges are highly irritating, haha. And people never seem to notice when clean something on a regular basis (i.e. bathrooms, lounges, kitchens, floors) BUT when you don't get around to doing something...thats when they do decide to speak up. So yeah...I understand the frustration of a service job and I totally agree with you on this one : )
I think having people work in food service or retail is a GREAT idea. Most of my jobs so far have been retail, and right now I am working in a rest stop along I-95 so I get ALL TYPES of people. I have never seen such diversity(within an hour I will have seen Middle Easterners, the Jews that still wear those black outfits, foreign Europeans, Amish, foreign Indians and Asians from all over, foreign Hispanics, every disability imaginable, and all ages), and I think it is a good experience. :)
I used to work in a bookstore, and I loved it. Decency is slowly dying.
the way people treat those considered a 'lower class' then them is extremely telling of their true character, regardless of how nicely they treat you or other peers.
I only lasted one day as a waitress. That was in 1977 and I've never forgotten the the horror of that day and, unless service is profoundly bad, I'm always very patient and polite. Sounds like Starbucks is particularly trying because you're dealing people who can only find their humanity in a cup of coffee. I worked at a pharmacy for several years and had the same kind of problems waiting on grouchy, sick and injured people who'd just waited hours and shelled out big bucks to be seen at the doctor's office and took out their frustration at the pharmacy. Not a happy work environment.
Wow. I would be a card-carrying member.
I'm from the Mid-West and what I don't get is how condescending people in retail and the food industry can be here on the East Coast. I am by no means a demanding person and I will often get treated like the scum between [insert random retail associate/food service worker]'s toes. I'm as polite as can be, even when I'm in the right.
Maybe I'm just missing the Mid-West.
PS I've worked at McDonald's for 9 months, Wal*Mart, Subway, Little Caesar's as well as taking inbound calls for orders for Cabela's. I'm currently a nanny.
@VersaGratis - People who read tend to be a bit nicer than people in restaurants, fortunately.
Spokenfor- this is so true... I worked in restaurants and coffee shops... those customers are THE worst. If they knew all the crap we went through for them, they probably wouldn't mind waiting a few extra minutes for a double shot skim no sugar shaken ten times poured upside down latte.
fabulous entry! i work in retail... need i say more.
Hmm....well, I haven't worked in food service, or retail, but I'd still want a card. Good idea.
I'd love a card. Sign me up. :) This, and a manual that illustrates for parents step by step how to teach their children the same thing.
so true about the hummers! people who drive them apparently want our planet to die.
do members get reward for doing good deeds? like frequent flyer points or something? :D
yes!!!! I totally totally feel you!!! I used to work for starbucks and I also worked at a ben and jerry's inside a huuuge tourist trap. I have also worked retail at hot topic and torrid and I have some major horror stories. I agree I think people would be waaaaaaay less douchey if everyone had to work at least one week in retail or in the food industry. I know that it makes me a hell of a lot nicer to people in restaurants and fast food places...unless they themselves are douche bags, then you know that person loses any rights to my niceness.
Well, I've never worked in the food industry, but I was brought up with good manners and a bucket-load of patience. I qualify for all of the other points. :( Haha. Seriously, this is quite an interesting post. I really don't understand why people are so rude sometimes. Is it so hard to say please and thank you or to wait two more minutes for your coffee?
Agreed. This shit is better than the baby sitter's club.
Brillant! My poor mom made my brother and I "memorize" those words and use them all the time - not just to others, but to each other as well. My mom always said be polite and conciderate to every clerk, waitress and cashier you ever met - today, they may just be your check-out girl, but tomorrow, he or she may be the CEO of your company. You never know. My mother-in-law always says, be a little bit nicer to everyone you meet because you don't know what battles they are facing in their life. Between the two of them, I learn everything I need to know about Human Decency. ~ L
I think this is a great idea, but I think humanity would weasle its out of it...Maybe it's just my lack of hope in the world, but it seems that whenever someone is humbled by an experience (be it with God, other people, etc.) that they ride a high for a little while and then come right back to how they were before that experience. People would work in retail/food service, feel bad about being rude, be nice, then something will happen and they'll be right back where they started..I used to have the same hope for people who used to work in retail (like, my hubby, for example) but they can be mean customers sometimes anyway..Awesome post!
Great post.
I remember when I first began dating my great aunt told me "A man who is nice to you but rude to the waitress is not a man worth knowing."
@MlleRobillard - agreed!
and I love this post
Hey, I'm an Actor which means I have worked as a waiter more than once in my life. I have been appalled at how some people treat those that work in service oriented jobs. Who do they think they are?? I know quite a few that need their cards revoked!
Michael