Tuesday, 15 July 2008
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Human Decency Membership Card
So I was talking to Michael about food service and retail, because he works for Starbucks and I used to. Rants about the lack of common courtesy resident in humanity are frequent for those of us who serve the general public. It was an Olympic event when I lived at home with my two other siblings who also work for Starbucks - we would spend 30 minutes at a time dissecting our days and discussing customer horror stories.
This recent conversation led Michael and I to the following conclusion: everyone should be required to carry a Human Decency Membership Card. At any time a person may be called upon to supply their HDMC if the veracity of your membership is doubted. If it is determined that you are not following the rules of the HDMC, your card may be torn violently from your offending hand and ripped up for the world to see. Speeches regarding your character (or lack thereof) may ensue. Sound harsh? It is. This may be an exlcusive club, as it seems the general populace is trending downward in the things that make us human. Here are some very salient membership requirements, the first and most important being:
1. You MUST have worked in food service/retail industry at some point in your life for a minimum of 60 days.
Why? Because most people wouldn't be such douchebags if they had to serve others for a little bit. You really get to see how awful or great people can be when presented with the opportunity to belittle someone in a position of servitude. People would be nicer at the drive-thrus. Folks would actually tip well. Impatience regarding the arrival of your meal would be nonexistent. Rudeness at the checkout in the grocery store would disappear. When you have been treated with condescension and cruelty just because you make lattes for a living, you are less likely to injure someone else in the same manner. You will also lose the proclivity to assume that the world revolves around you and your Triple Grande Nonfat, No-Foam, 1/3 Decaf, 2 1/2 Pump Vanilla, 190 Degree Latte.
2. You cannot own a Hummer. You just lost all humanity points.
I'm not a communist. I just think these vehicles should be illegal.
3. You must learn to memorize & utilize such phrases as "Please", "Thank You", "You're Welcome", "After You", "I'm sorry", "It was my fault", "I apologize", "I forgive you", "Take Your Time", & "No problem".
You also must mean those phrases and act accordingly. Please refrain from sighing, tapping impatiently, or demanding free things.
And really there is only one rule of membership and that is the Golden one: "Treat others as you would like to be treated". This ethic of reciprocity should be inherent in those who consider themselves decent human beings and owners of the HDMC.
I never do this, but I'm fond of this post & passionate about this topic. Comment if you want, but please recommend it if you agree with anything. And feel free to add to this list or to share your own stories.
I may also create some type of code for your blog if you or someone you know is eligible for membership. The card above is a mock-up, so please express your interest if you would like this card and the badge of honor it portrays.
EDIT: That is the completed card above - I decided to utilize the most carried card in US Society...no offense to our foreign compatriots. I was just trying to be ironic. Also, I'm not really good with creating codes that can be inserted into your blog. I'm sorry. I might need some assistance? In the meantime, here's the img src code that you can award yourself if you meet the requirements or award to someone else ok?
<img src="http://xf4.xanga.com/362c9032d2632200475588/m155344813.jpg" alt="hdmc" style="width:580px" />
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Comments (349)
@aahcoffee - yes! The only thing more day-ruining than a rude grown-up is an out-of-control child. I waited tables for years, and I don't know how many trays of hot food or glasses that I almost dumped on a little kid because they were running around and dodging right under my feet and their parents were totally oblivious! Parents, we are carrying knives, glasses, hot (sometimes VERY hot) food and beverages. Think about this before you let your children run around like ill-trained monkies!
Um, that rant was unintended. Sorry.
Saying "please" and "thank you" to those who serve you is definitely deserved. The only thing I'd like to add to this post is, what about rude servers? The rule I believe in is "Whatever you are doing to make a living, do it like it's your job." Not just some part time you picked up to pay the rent. I don't doubt the fact that the people serving more often than not get treated poorly, but just wanted to point out that there are some rude servers as well.
i definitely know what you mean. i worked at a movie theater before and people were such bastards :(
i'm 16 and have spent a year and a half doing landscape maintenance and physical labor for the super wealthy, i feel your pain. i wish everyone knew how to convey general respect and decency, but that seems like too much to ask for.
I completely agree with you - I am working a retail job right now, and the rudeness that some customers treat myself and my coworkers with is absolutely ridiculous. What's worse is that because of my place of work, these rude customers are very likely to have children with them who are watching them mistreat the people who work there.
I've worked at a fast food (burger king) and retail (GAP)!! ahh... and I agree with you!!
Oh my gosh!! I love this! Thank-you so much for posting it!! I also think it is so funny that you wrote what you did for number two because I feel exactly the same way :)
I worked in Quiznos for about a year and a half, and ever since I've been the most polite little fuck on the planet.
I completely agree with you - I am working a
retail job right now, and the rudeness that some customers treat myself
and my coworkers with is absolutely ridiculous. What's worse is that
because of my place of work, these rude customers are very likely to
have children with them who are watching them mistreat the people who
work there. My site налоговый вычет
i like this post =]
SO...I totally get this blog. I work at Old Navy, and I can relate to your many experiences.
Loved reading it!!
How did you know that Triple Grande Nonfat, No-Foam, 1/3 Decaf, 2 1/2 Pump Vanilla, 190 Degree Latte is my drink of choice? Hehe just kidding!
I totally know what you mean! I used to work at an internationally known tourist attraction cafe. Imagine a Starbucks (we did serve Starbucks!) with barely-English-speaking foreign tourists ALL day!
I'm in the white collar world now but I did my time at Caribou Coffee. It's insane how badly people in the service sector get treated. My experience has made me particularly conscientious of being nice to others who serve me.
I worked at Starbucks for 2 years, and I know exactly how you feel! Some days I would get so fed up with the customers that I would go home in a rotten mood and dread coming back the next day. Thanks for sharing! Your post was very entertaining :)
simply. amazing. i agree with you 100%...i worked at taco for 2 years before moving on to youth work...i always thought that every kid in high school should work at a fast food place for at least a year...i think it teaches the value of common courtesy and 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you' in a time when so much of that is lacking in the general public...so thank you...for caring.
This is by far the best idea ever! RECOMEND!!!!
Ah, when I worked at Domino's my friends and I would discuss ideas like this. Possibly upon completion of high school, one should spend the three months prior to college working in food service or else they couldn't go to any higher institute of learning, be it 4 year university or even school of cosmotology. I'm finally out of food service (after five very long years) and in a book store, but while the workplace changes, customers never do.
agree fully!
An olympic event discussing this topic... cracked me up...
what a fantastic idea
after having worked retail, call centres, restaurants, etc... and having to deal with customers all day long, that'd certainly be nice if everyone actually was decent and mannered
Great Idea! I have worked in retail for over 6 years, and continue to, and I really don't understand where people get off treating me and my employees as less than human just because of our job. We are educated, work hard and we deserve to be treated with respect and dignity just like everyone else. I've had customers call me names (stupid, sl*t, c*nt bi*ch), swear at me, throw products at me, yell in my face, throw products on the floor just to watch me pick them up, deliberatly do things that I told them not to, break things on purpose to get a discount, lie to try to get me fired and much, much worse.
I also don't understand why anyone in their right mind would ever consider buying or driving a hummer or why it is so difficult for people to use their manners.
damn, i just failed from rule #1!
Ooh, great entry. I think I'm eligible. I worked at Safeway (in the deli, of all places) for a couple months last summer as my First Real Job and now I work at Sears in the photo studio, and have for almost a year now.
I love my tiny little Kia.
I don't want to talk about how polite I can be--seems....counterintuitive somehow.
What a great idea! xD
i agree, hummers are absolutely revolting.
I haven't had a job in retail or food service, but I do know how rude people can be. It's like people believe that the people who work at restaurants are their servants or something. Some people say that they are paying money to be there so they should get the best service possible... well you chose to be there right, so you might as well treat the place with respect. I try to be as nice as I can to the people who serve me, it's the least I can do.